Appendicitis
by CornCob
Summary: Cloud's a disgruntled in-patient hellbent on making the hospital staff as miserable as he is. Fortunately, Leon is around to distract our favorite blond. Let's just hope the doctor doesn't kill them both. As always: For Sleighbells! L/C, Minor S/V


Disclaimer: No owning of Jurassic Park, Skittles, or Final Fantasy/KH for me.

**A/N:** Wrote this back on November 9th for Sleighbells. She had just had her appendix removed, among other things, and I figured that I would write her a get-well fic. So there I sat, in the uncomfortable chair (it was broken, as if it weren't crappy enough to start with) next to her while she slept her miserable and drugged self away in the hospital bed and typed my little self into a brain dead state. You'll notice that some of this story doesn't really…like…_flow_. Well sorry. I was tired, and I never ever ever want to sleep overnight in a hospital again. But that's just what an awesome best friend I am, hahaha. Seriously, though…never again.

Hope you guys enjoy this.

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"They did what to his what now?" A teenaged brunet asked, eyeing the man in a white lab coat skeptically. The doctor rolled his eyes, his usual ugly sneer falling into place.

"His doctor removed his appendix and examined a few minor abnormal build-ups as well. They were just extra tissues, it is actually quite common."

The brunet raised a chocolate eyebrow.

"If they're 'quite common,' then why did you just call them abnormal?"

The doctor frowned, giving the youth his best 'you are scum' expression before shaking his head and eyeing his clipboard.

"I don't have time to play around with you. If you talk to me like that again I will be sure to accidentally inject your little friend with a syringe full of oxygen."

"Doctor Hojo! Come quickly! We just had a patient's heart rupture!" Upon hearing his name, the greasy doctor rolled his eyes and grimaced before turning on his heel and heading down the hall without so much as a word. His overly starched lab coat barely even moved as he did so.

The brunet shot the bird at the retreating man's back before he felt the phone in his pocket vibrate. He pulled it out to see that he had a text message from the very person he was here to see.

_**"I'm in ro**__**o**__**m 4060. Come see me. Bring Skittles."**_

The boy laughed silently as he slid the phone into his pocket and attempted to make his way to room 4060. Fortunately, he had known his friend for a long time now and knew that if he came without Skittles, he'd best not come at all. As such, he patted his back pocket, satisfied when he felt the bag still in place.

As he came to the information desk, he noticed several nurses scattered about behind it. A few of them seemed to be giggling and mumbling about one of the patients getting on 'his' last nerve. Slightly annoyed at the laughing, though undeniably curious, the youth approached a nurse sitting away from the group. He was a moody looking young man with thick, black hair who seemed to be staring longingly in the direction of the elevators. His name badge read "Vincent Valentine". Below his name was a picture of himself with a painfully forced smile.

"I'm here to visit Cloud Strife."

The black haired man looked up with bored, red eyes.

"Are you a relative?"

The brunet seemed to freeze, his brain stalling. "Uhh…"

Vincent rolled his eyes.

"That little fucker is ruining my night. He's driving the doctor absolutely crazy, and when the doctor is pissy, my night shift is miserable. Now I'm not allowed to let any non-family members in, but if you'll keep that obnoxious Shit occupied, by all means, I can see the striking family resemblance."

The boys eyes widened at the bitchy nurse's bluntness before answering slowly.

"Yes…um, he's my..cousin."

Vincent nodded, satisfied.

"Name?"

"Le..Squall Leonhart."

Vincent scribbled it down on his clip board before looking up with a shockingly gorgeous smile.

"Go to the elevator on the left. Press floor four and it will be on the second hall, third door on the right. 4060. And if you see a doctor who looks like he's ready to pull the plug on every living thing in this hospital… if he tries to stop you, tell him Vin said you could stay."

Leon smirked and raised his hand in a mock salute.

"Will do; thanks."

Leon made it a few steps down the hallway before he heard the man call to him.

"And if you _**do**_run in to him, tell him I'm getting awfully lonely down here."

At that, some of the nurses giggled while many of them glared, and Leon nodded, turning and making his way to the desired room. Upon reaching it, he considered knocking, but decided against it, and instead just walked right in. On the bed, covered up to his chest in blankets, was a thin blond staring blankly at the television. Upon hearing the door, the boy looked up.

"Got my skittles?"

Leon grinned, already pulling them from his pocket as he took a seat next to the bed

He propped his feet up on the edge of the hospital bed as the blond turned off the TV.

"It's about time you got here. I've been bored as hell in here all by myself."

Leon smiled. He knew Cloud probably just didn't want to be alone right now, either. After all, who WOULD want to stay alone on a hospital over night?

"I figured, especially with all those messages you've been sending me. How did you manage that, anyway? Thought you wouldn't be able to keep your phone on you."

Cloud smirked.

"Well, it_** was**_ pissing the staff off, 'specially my doctor."

Leon rolled his eyes. Of course Cloud would pass the time harassing the staff. He was CLOUD.

"Yea, I heard the nurses downstairs talking about that. This one guy said you've been driving everyone crazy."

Cloud sighed.

"Well I've been bored!" he whined.

His eyes then brightened as he remembered something.

"Wanna see something cool?" Leon looked weary as Cloud pointed to his bed

"I've got buttons for everything right here. I've got my bed controls, a telephone, the TV remote, and then there's _this_. This is what's been keeping me entertained all night. Or rather, who."

Leon looked doubtful at Cloud's evil expression.

"See, for this floor there is only one actual Doctor tonight. I think he's been here since some time yesterday morning. He's hungry, he's exhausted, and he's so easy to fuck with. Between me and the 'incompetent nurses' he has to 'babysit,' I think he's just a few threads away from snapping."

Cloud pointed to the large red button on his hospital bed. The label read "Call."

Leon's mind flashed to Vincent warning him about Psycho-Doctor. He was about to protest, but it was too late. Cloud pressed the button and the speaker buzzed to life.

"Welcome to Sonic, please order when you're ready."

At the shocked expression that came over Cloud's face, Leon could only chuckle.

"Not who you were expecting?" Leon whispered, causing Cloud to shake his head dumbly.

"Who is this?" The blond asked, having not been ready for someone to actually have a sense of humor around here.

"This is resident super-hunk, and medical extraordinaire, Nurse Fair. You can call me Zack. The shifts just changed and I will now be at your beck and call until…five am. I don't suppose you would be the patient driving this evening's only doctor insane, would you?"

Cloud grinned, something in this man's voice and attitude making him likeable.

"Yes it would, I don't suppose he is around, is he? Or did he go home for the night?"

There were a few moments of silence before the man's cheery voice traveled over the intercom again.

"'Fraid not, friend. He's filling in for like…three guys tonight, so yes, he would be here. Actually, he just came around the corner and is giving me a positively hateful look. May I send him your way?"

Leon smiled and Cloud laughed.

"Yes, if you would, please. I really have to pee and I would really feel more comfortable if someone as qualified as himself would assist me, rather than a nurse. No offense." The brunet rolled his eyes, amused both by Cloud and the friendly nurse and hoping that it was just him, and that the two weren't actually flirting.

"None taken. He'll be on his way. If you need me, you know what to do."

With that, the static faded and the intercom link closed.

The blond ripped open his bag of candy, handing the green ones to Leon as he poured them in his hand. Cloud did _not_ eat the green ones.

Both boys looked up as the hospital room door opened and in stepped a very tall, very agitated looking man. He had long silver hair that was pulled back into a ponytail that trailed down the back of his white coat. He had a pair of thin-framed glasses over a pair angry, green cat eyes that disturbed Leon more than just a little. This _had_ to be the guy Vincent was talking about. As the silver-haired man's eyes fell upon the brunet, anger turned to barely concealed rage.

"Who are _you_." The question came out as more of a statement really, and Leon got the distinct feeling that this man did not want him here.

"I'm his cousin." He answered, trying to hold the doctor's gaze. Deciding that he didn't like staring at the man's strange eyes, he instead looked downwards for a name badge. Ah, so Evil did have a name, and apparently it was going by Doctor "Sephiroth" these days. The lack of a last name also struck him as odd, though he didn't have time to think about it.

"My _cousin_?" Cloud asked, incredulously.

"Yea, okay." The blond muttered sarcastically as an afterthought.

Leon closed his eyes slowly before staring sharply at Cloud. The blond looked confused momentarily before it dawned on him, and he suddenly felt very, very stupid.

"I'm going to have to ask you to leave." The doctor's cold voice left no room for question, although Cloud felt compelled to try anyway.

"Can he please stay? I'm sorry I've been bothering you all night. I'll stop if I have someone to occupy me, I swear."

He was only met with a blank, green-eyed stare before Sephiroth's gaze dropped to review Cloud's charts.

"No."

"Aw come on, Seph." A voice from behind cooed. Two of the three men looked back to see a tanned, black haired man with smiling violet eyes, Sephiroth just continued to stare at the papers. It was the same voice from over the loud-speaker.

"Let the kid stay, huh? Like he said, he'll leave ya alone now that he's got someone to keep him busy. You have enough to worry about, like the rest of this whole damn floor's patients. And you haven't gone downstairs to check on your 'friend' in a while. He's overdue for a wink, I do believe."

"No." The answer was sharp and cold and Cloud felt his heart drop. He really didn't want to go back to being alone in this depressing room. The only company he had was when random, dead-eyed nurses came in to check his vitals or when he could goad his over-worked, sleep-deprived doctor to come in.

Leon felt his stomach twist at the broken-hearted expression on Cloud's face. While he didn't really care to argue with this pissed off doctor, he also couldn't just walk away from the blond without trying.

"Vin said I could stay."

At that, Sephiroth's head jerked up from his clipboard, his eyes finally displaying something other than hatred towards…well, everything.

"OOooohhhh…" Zack drawled out, a coy smile on his face.

"I think he's gotcha there, Doc."

Sephiroth cut his eyes over to the hooting nurse, and Leon felt a sense of hope rise upwards.

"He also said to tell you, should I see you…" The brunet met the silver haired man's gaze once more. "That he was getting lonely."

Leon assumed he had done something right, as he watched the smile on Zack's face nearly double size, as well as in mischief, and the tall doctor set down his charts.

"I'll be back in an hour or so to check on you."

With that, Sephiroth strolled quickly from the room, glaring as Zack's mirth filled gazed followed him until he was out of sight.

"That was awesome." The black haired man stated in awe, walking over to the two boys and plopping down in a second chair. Cloud grinned at Leon in thanks before moving his eyes over to Zack.

"Who's 'Vin?'"

Zack smirked.

"He's a nurse downstairs that our favorite doctor has the total hots for. Honestly, I think Valentine is the only reason Seph doesn't kill everybody in this place."

Cloud nodded slowly.

"Well that's comforting."

"I'll say. I've had to drag Vincent up here on more than one occasion to get Seph off my ass, so yea, thank God for him. Anyway, I've got to get back out to my station, but I couldn't help but notice that our dear doctor didn't help you to the restroom…" he drifted off suggestively, and Leon really didn't like the thought of this man helping the blond use the bathroom.

Cloud waved his hand dismissively, much to the brunet's relief.

"I don't really have to go, I just wanted to mess with him, and show him to Leon."

Zack laughed.

"I can understand that. Seph really is a sight to behold, isn't he?" Zack rolled his eyes. "Which is probably why most of the nurses always complain about Vincent, the jealous bitches." He smiled once more before standing from his chair and stretching.

"All righty. Off to sit on my ass for a few hours while Seph runs around and does all the work. I'll send someone to check in on ya later."

As the man slipped out of the doorway, Leon gave Cloud a disbelieving look.

"Who _are _these people?"

The blond only smiled and shifted, fidgeting to get comfortable in his bed.

"I have no idea, but they certainly are interesting. Nice going, by the way, using that Vin thing. I thought he was going to make you leave." He added an adorable pout to the end of his sentence, looking at Leon with large blue eyes.

The two stared at each other, something in Cloud's eyes finally registering in Leon's brain. Surely he didn't want to….Here?

Cloud smiled innocently as the emotions passed on Leon's face. He scooted over, making room and patting the empty space beside him.

"Lay with me?"

The brunet glanced at the closed door before looking back at the small blond. Well, Sephiroth had said he'd be back in an hour…and surely Zack wouldn't send someone in _too_ soon.

Giving one last glance at the door, Leon shook his head and smirked before toeing off his shoes and crawling into the bed with Cloud. He was very careful not to detach any of the tubes or IVs in Cloud's hands and wrists as he gently slid down beside him.

"So lets see…" The brunet mused as he moved to hover just over the blonds face.

"How _will_ we do this?"

Cloud's thin, pink lips pulled into a seductive smirk as he lifted his IV-free hand to trail down Leon's neck and over his shirt covered chest, finally resting on the man's lean waist.

"I'm sure you'll think of something." He whispered, leaning forward to speak directly into the man's ear.

"Just remember, I don't have anything on underneath this gown." He ended the whisper by dragging the tip of his tongue over the shell of Leon's ear, making sure to breathe heavily into it, letting the tanned man know exactly how hot he already was.

The heated breath in his ear made Leon come undone, his left hand digging into Cloud's hair and his right wildly tunneled under the sheets to grasp the growing erection beneath the thin gown before covering the blond's teasing mouth with his own. Their lips slid against each other as Cloud responded to the brunet's touching, writhing and moaning into Leon's mouth as he frantically tried to touch the other man as well. He tried to fish a hand downwards towards the cock pressing into his side, but he reeled back in pain as the needle in his arm snagged on the blankets, sending waves of discomfort through him. At the sudden reaction, Leon pulled back and stared down at Cloud, his eyes softening in understanding. This really wasn't going to work. There was no way Cloud could go through with this without causing harm to himself, and Leon would be damned if _he_ hurt him, either…Unless…

"Don't move."

Cloud's eyes were filled with apology as Leon suddenly smirked and kissed him again. He only shook his head at the blond's questioning look as he carefully twisted down the bed until he was on his side, his face was level with Cloud's now painful erection, and his own throbbing member by Cloud's chest.

"But what about yo-" the blond tried to ask before talented hands shoved the paper gown up and a hot mouth surrounded his heated flesh. He gasped for breath as the fiery tongue licked up and down the shaft, nearly cumming on spot at what happened next.

As the brunet continued to caress Cloud with his tongue, his hand traveled to his own pants, quickly unzipping and shoving them away. He then grabbed a hold of his hardened cock, pumping it slowly at first within Cloud's perfect line of sight.

Watching the brunet jack himself off in such vivid, clear detail was getting the better of Cloud as he felt himself be completely engulfed once more. With the hand not currently pumping himself, Leon angled his arm so that he could reach around Cloud's legs to grasp gently at the blond's balls, massaging them and causing Cloud to release a breathless shout. He continued to suck the boy off as well as work his own member as he trailed his hand from Cloud's balls to his ass, snaking his finger to rub almost roughly at the opening. The first contact, combined with the mouth on his cock and watching Leon masturbate finally became too much for Cloud, as he lost himself inside of the brunet's waiting mouth.

Hearing the airy moan rip itself from Cloud, Leon finally succumbed to the heat in his belly, exploding in his own hand and against Cloud's chest.

He laid still for a moment before cautiously turning and moving back up the bed.

As he got settled, he felt the blond shuffle to lie more closely to him, almost molding against him as he nuzzled the top of his head into his neck. Leon let a lazy smile cover his face.

"As soon as we get home and you're all healed, you _so_ owe me."

Cloud laughed quietly and yawned, sleepily mumbling against Leon's neck.

"Sounds fair."

The boys lay together, enjoying the feeling of being close for not nearly long enough before a very unhappy voice broke their peace.

"_**Wha**__**t **_do you think you're _**doing**_."

Both men in the bed whipped their heads upwards to see a very angry looking doctor standing by the door, behind them they could see Zack's shocked expression before the dark haired man quickly ducked out of the doorway.

"Uhhh…Sexual healing?" Cloud attempted with his best smile, though his now bruised lips kind of took the innocence out of it. Sephiroth's hands clenched around his clipboard as he took a step into the room, neither of the two in the bed daring to move from their spots. Maybe it was like Jurassic Park. If you stayed perfectly still, he couldn't see you…

It would seem that on the dinosaur scale, the silver haired man was more Velociraptor than Tyrannosaurus, however, since he seemed to have no problem locating them. Sephiroth drew nearer, his face curling in disgust at the "excretions" now soiling the front of Cloud's hospital smock.

"Do you realize that you could get me fired for this?" His voice was absolutely furious, although he seemed to be controlling the urge to rip them apart rather well. For now at least. Raptor instincts were a flighty thing, after all.

Leon was trying to figure out just how he would fair in a fight with this man when the most wonderful thing happened. In the doorway behind the furious doctor appeared Zack, though it was what Zack had that would be the boys' saving grace. Being physically hauled into the room was a very caught off guard Vincent Valentine. There wasn't much time for the confused man to think as Zack mumbled a quick "I'm really sorry about this" before clutching him by the shoulders.

"Hey Seph?" The violet eyed man called, causing the silver haired man to turn around before saying a quick prayer and shoving Vincent to the ground. The red-eyed man yelped as the floor got much too close much too quickly and the other four cringed, though Zack forced himself to recover and took off down the hall.

The two in the bed were completely forgotten as Sephiroth's cruel demeanor disappeared, replaced by a humorous panic and his eyes widened, quickly moving to help the small raven haired nurse on the floor.

It would seem that everyone else in the world disappeared as Vincent lifted his head, his eyes meeting with Sephiroth's through the hair in his face. They held each other's gaze as the silver haired doctor looped an arm around his waist and gently lifted him from the floor.

Cloud and Leon tried to contain their smiles at the complete one-eighty that their 'heartless' doctor had just made. It was funny to see him go from murderous intent to tender and gentle in two seconds flat. Apparently his inhumanely long shift had finally gotten to Sephiroth's head, and he didn't really care about acceptable workplace practices for the time being. Besides, he deserved _something_ for working 27.5 hours, right?

The two men stood stock still with their chests and midsections pressed together, each just staring at each other. Vincent seemed to get tired of waiting as he stood up on the tips of his toes and pressed his mouth against Sephiroth's, raising is leg to wrap around the taller man's waist. The other leg soon following suit as Sephiroth's hands found themselves on Vincent's ass and the dark haired man began moaning into the other's mouth.

As the two crashed back against a wall and their heated make out session continued, Cloud and Leon tried not to stare. They found it a lost cause however, when Sephiroth's hand made it's way into the petite nurse's pants, causing the smaller man to groan loudly. Resuming where he had left off with his bag of Skittles, Cloud wondered just what it would take to convince Leon to have his appendix removed sometime in the near future. Maybe he could even get a summer job here, who knew. All he knew was that he had to see these people more often.

* * *

A/N: Yep. There you have it. Utter crack, I know. Hopefully it wasn't _too_ farfetched. If it was….well whatever. I've dealt with it, and I'm sure you can manage to do the same. 


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